Friday, April 11, 2008

Côtes du Rhône's Famous Hippo and Hedgehog are Hitting the Pavement

Decanter reports that the famous cartoon mascots are currently hitting the Help Wanted pages, fired after recent fears that their "cute" appearance may influence children to drink. In a recent interview with both Hippo and Hedgehog on Nightline, they stated their concerns that the wine industry is being hypocritical.

"After a decade of having a glass of wine glued to my hoof, spending ridiculous amounts of money on dermatologist bills, and now they want me to give it all up because their largest export market, the UK, fears that children are associating a hippo drinking wine as a seductive message?! I find it ludicrous, especially when Budo Kun's making international headlines for his recent sexual escapades, yet that's not influencing kids to drink? He's a fu**** wine bottle for Christ's sake! Yet Hedgehog and I are seen as the anti-christs! When was the last time you associated my big ass with a fantastic bottle of wine?"

Hedgehog followed up his best friend's comments by stating his own frustrations with the blatantly apparent hypocrisy. "My personal take isn't as dramatic as my buddy's, as Chile is already negotiating a new contract with us, but I'm definitely seeing something more underhanded going on here. If this were truly about children's well-being, don't you think our friends posing on wine bottles internationally would also be out of a job? But nooo, while bull, kangaroo and little penguin all retain their contracts, we're out of work. So I'm not led to believe this is for "the good of the young", no, I'm seeing this more as outright prejudism against hippos and hedgehogs!!!"

The press agent for Côtes du Rhône would not comment, although recent reports of violence against hippos and hedgehogs has been reported worldwide. The most recent story coming from a man in NZ using innocent hedgehogs as violent weapons against children.


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Sasha said...

lolz to the above post.

also, where the heck are you peeps? how bout an update? did i miss something? on vacation?


Amy said...

Maybe Alice Feiring's new book will be entitled "How I Saved the World from Hedgehogs and Hippos." Sounds like something really needs to be done about these little misanthropes. And Alice can just keep saving the wine world over again and again.

Anonymous said...

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